an ode to emptiness

I have oft noted the way life often seems to be punctuated by emptiness. That is, if one has enough time to stand back and reflect. Indeed, isn't it the reason why most of us, who think, try to fill up our waking moments with trivial pursuits - trying to block out the ever looming question of what one's life amounts to?
There's emptiness and then there's emptiness. We often feel we know what it'll take for us to fill the emptiness in our mind, the emptiness in our heart and the emptiness in our soul. When I'm not with the woman I love, I feel her presence and love will drive out the emptiness. When I am not working, I feel returning to work will make life more meaningful. As long as we have something to work towards, our life has an illusion of meaning. But an illusion is all it is. When we achieve that goal which lends meaning to our existence and endeavours, the meaning is lost. It becomes just another part of our life, of our past. Then of course, I set myself a new goal. I tell myself my life still has meaning. But what's the ultimate goal? Wherein lies the ultimate meaning? Is it getting a good job? Is it excelling at work and getting promoted? Is it earning more money? Is it becoming the richest person on earth? Is it creating wealth? Is it working for a charity? Is it toiling in a research lab to find the cure for a killer disease? Is it toiling in a lab splitting atoms and finding more about the universe? Is it spending all your evenings in the company of your loved ones? Is it being in the arms of the person you love? Is it sex? Is it marriage? Is it excelling at your sport? Is it creating a world record?
What gives your life meaning? Does it really?
I find my life having a constant measure of emptiness. I find myself always looking beyond the current achievement, beyond the current goal. And I see the void looming beyond. What's the reason for the emptiness? Is it the need to feel that I am not put here on this earth to measure out a span of time... that there's a deeper purpose? What is that purpose? Will I ever find it? Doubtful. Will I go on trying? Definitely. Will I go on failing? Likely.

the tale of a greedy company

It's mind-boggling how much some companies exploit their employees... and a company I am closely associated with is one of them. Please note that I am not at liberty to disclose any names because I have signed a non-disclosure agreement and a code of conduct agreement. Indeed, the company is so petrified of getting their shit ruined by some disgruntled employee exposing their real face to the world that they force everybody to sign these exhaustive agreements that cover their sorry asses. The top management is totally incompetent, moronic and disgustingly two-faced. This company has a white-as-snow image in the national and international media. Indeed, you might call it the darling of the press. Little is known about how this darling of the press exploits its employees and sucks every bit of blood from them as possible.
Just a small example of what I am talking about. This is the story of Richard (name changed).
In Richard's deputation to the UK, he was being paid a UK salary by this company. It was quite adequate, until they decided to play their shit. In the UK, people such as Richard, are entitled to tax breaks for the first 2 years. So guess what the company did... it reduced the UK salaries for people staying less than 2 years, and claimed the tax benefits for itself. Employees received salaries net of tax benefits, and their in-hand was reduced considerably. When there was a hue and cry about this, top management played their card of "if you don't like it, shove off" to quiet things down. Plus new arrivals to the UK were none the wiser, because they didn't know any better. No prizes for guessing that "business requirements" now dictated that no employee travelling to the UK from then on, would be able to stay beyond 2 years :)) Shitfaced shiteating bastards!
What the ingenious people of this company did later, was to negotiate with the department of Inland Revenue in the UK to extend the tax benefits to the period even before they rolled it out. So now they have the gall to request all people who were in the UK before that period to submit a P87 form so that the company can claim the tax benefits that the employees should have received.
Richard is pretty well known in this company as a shit stirrer, because such apalling policies usually gall him to the extent that he lashes out at the policies publicly. He knows he is not doing himself any favours, because he has seen it affect his career track in spite of his good performance. So this time, instead of stirring up this raw sewage that the company is concocting, he just refuses to comply. He was supposed to receive a salary, from which he paid legitimate tax. If he can't get the benefit of the UK government's policy, intended for people like him, he'll be damned if he'll stand by and let the shitfaced ass-wipes in this company take it either!
I might post more instances of corporate greed here... It would make for a long and interesting series of posts :)

Will the tiger's flame be extinguished?

Recently, the central bureau of investigation of India (CBI) conducted a study on the tiger population in one of the tiger reserves in India - Sariska national park in Rajasthan.
The result - tigers have not been inhabiting the place for some time now.

Here's the news article.

Who's to blame, I ask you. The entire system.

Project Tiger, who have never really got their act together since their inception. All they did was waste a lot of money, lie about the number of tigers and neglect the animals themselves.
Since the beginning, scientists have demonstrated conclusively that the pugmark system of census taking is highly unreliable. In a study, pug-marks from just 2 tigers, made in different locations, were identified by forest officials as having been made by more like 16 different tigers. No wonder the numbers seemed so healthy. The poachers must have had a real tough time trying finding to find the remaining 20 tigers after they poached all 4 of Sariska's real tigers (I have made up the numbers for the sake of illustration)!

This is the Sariska page of Project Tiger. What a SHAM!
All good and nice on paper. Reality is something else.
This is a random tourist agency web page. They claim "With luck, sighting a tiger, chital, sambar, leopard, chinkara, or crocodile basking in the sun on the shores of the Siliserh Lake are not rare." HA!!

So who is to blame? The government of the state of Rajasthan are to blame. They have criminally neglected the national park. The motherfucking bastards who were involved in the poaching are to blame. Like I always maintain - they should be hunted down and kept alive for torture for years until they realize the gravity of what they have done. The people of my country are to blame, for not caring enough. We're all bastards and we have failed to protect this lovely creature. All the motherfucking bastards who create the market for tiger products are to blame most of all. This includes many bastards in China and some bastards in the so called developed countries. They should also be tracked down and put down for the venomous scum of this world that they are.

It's not surprising that this has happened. But news like this makes me want to drop everything, take up arms and start hunting me some tiger hunters.